Why Growth Takes More Than Following Someone Else’s Steps

It started with a childhood belief, that I didn’t have a green thumb.

I watched my brother plant seeds that sprouted into life. I followed his steps, mimicked his care, but my plants never seemed to thrive. Over time, I internalized the idea that anything I tried to nurture would wither. That maybe I just wasn’t made for growing things.

But with age, something shifted. It wasn’t about luck or innate ability. It wasn’t about having some mystical gardening magic. It was about learning to listen.

Plants, like people, are not one-size-fits-all. Each one has its own rhythm, its own needs, its own language of care. Some crave sunlight. Some wilt if you give them too much. Some need more space. Others thrive pressed against each other.

I began to see growth—both in plants and in life—not as a formula, but as a relationship.

The soil matters. The light matters. The container matters. But what matters most is presence. Attunement. Willingness to observe and adjust.

This became a metaphor for everything:

• My relationships.
• My work.
• My healing.
• My parenting.

I no longer believe in the myth of the green thumb. I believe in patience. In observation. In tuning into what’s actually needed, not what worked for someone else.

You don’t have to get it right the first time. You don’t have to be an expert before you begin.

Whether you’re growing a garden, a business, or a deeper sense of self— what you need most isn’t perfection. It’s curiosity. It’s care. It’s presence.

The beauty is not in forcing things to grow. It’s in learning what helps them bloom.

—Alicia

“What are you growing right now? What’s asking for your presence, not your perfection?”